True

It would probably do me some good to not write when certain feelings and emotions grip me, when writing seems the most compelling release. For heaven's sake, Jae, Don't write when you are "emotional!" You just look like a fool later on. It's so true.

I remember long ago, I wrote a letter to dear dear friend of mine. Writing it felt so right, compelling, convincing, cathartic even. But now, when I recall that letter, I blush. That was my last attempt at a love letter.

So, right now, when I am neither angry or happy, anxious or aloof, I write. There is nothing going on, no particular cravings or desires, no passionate exhortation, or such, just relaxing and procrastinating.

Okay. Here I go. "So.... what's going on..." Notice how daft that sounds. Second try, "You look really great today..." No? How about, "I miss you." No, I don't think that was appropriate. How about, "The Lord is my shepherd and I am his sheep. And you know what sheep are? Stupid! Har har har!" Fine, that's way too TK-ish. What do people talk about when there is nothing to talk about? Nothing; force two strangers together and there is nothing to talk about, unless one happens to be overly hospitable and lively or the other on the positive of a manic episode. Cynical.

I guess conversation is an art; unfortunately, I lack certain artistic skills. I think when I meet others for the first time, there is a distinct impression of "awkward compatibility." Forgive me when I talk about myself for a while in the most conceited manner. I think, I can do that. When I am forced to talk to someone, I make the other person comfortable, but scrambling to find something else to talk about as soon as the current topic expires. Whatever.