Today at B&N

I studied for the LSAT today, it was quite eventful. I find that scores are like people with ED, they're hard to get up. Despite it, I was rather pleased with the current progress I am making. So whoo hoo for me.

However, there was a major distraction that sullied my study experience. Loud people. I mean, I admit I did not choose the best place to study as it is often bombarded with loud coffee grating sounds, but I felt that I needed to prepare myself for the unexpected distractions of the actual LSAT test by testing in noisy situations. But today, it was unbearable.

Before I say why, I think it is necessary for me to fully elaborate myself and my stance on race. I think race is a beautiful thing, and in certain contexts, racism can be pretty funny. I think we, especially asians, like to see race as a trump card, a dependable fallback plan-b. ie,

Wong: "Oh I got a 100% on my math test."
White Dude: "Word? It's because you're asian."

At this point Wong (a stereotypical asian name for your blowhards) is faced with three choices.
1. Affirm the I.W.D.
"Yea, Asians are the best. AzN PrIdE! lol!"
2. Diss the I.W.D.
"No you jackass, I studied for two weeks for this damn test. Apparently my skin color affects my intellect?"
3. Ignore the I.W.D.
"Go get a chinese character tattoo on your arm and pretend to be culturally aware. I hope the tattooist is asian and tattoos Weak Prick instead of "Strength."

But I digress, race is still beautiful and it is right to be proud of your skin color. Of course, shouting White Pride! in the middle of the NAACP does not constitute as "expression of self," so be wary of your context and situation.

Now, back to the story. There are three things louder than anything in the world.

First: Asian women, more specifically, middle-aged Asian women. They just don't give a damn. I think if they could, they would just walk around in a ratty bathrobe with a cigarette in their mouth and curlers in their hair. (For reference, see Kung Fu Hustle)

Second: Middle-aged Black women. Dammit, some of them are loud as hell. The decibel level of some of them are off the roof. Even their silence is deafening. Note this comment is not racist, only racial. And you know it's true. Deep down in your hearts.

Third: Overconfident packs of High School Nerds. These groups come in primarily two varieties.

a. The first one is usually comprised of the more alternative (euphemism alert) group consisting of androgynous boys in girl jeans, long hair swept to the side, and maybe a lipring. The girls in this group are usually overweight, darker in the Hot Topic tees and wear studded belts.

b. The second group is more pathetic. It is usually made up primarily of wannabe-attractive girls and one (never more) boy. At first glance, it seems impressive until you see past the illusion and penetrate the predicament that the boy is in. You see, he will never ever be able to date any of those girls because to them, he is a girl. The only reason why he is allowed to hang out with those girls is because he is a non-threat to them. The girls are not afraid of the boy, who is pitifully trying to assert his nonexistent dominance by talking loudly so that everyone within a H-bomb radius can hear. Ironically, these boys wear skin-tight girl jeans and are usually of shorter stature.

Well basically, at a certain improbabilistic (cruel?) moment in history, all three seemed to converge at this small B&N cafe. How could time be so cruel as to intertwine all three fate-strings into one critical intersection? Needless to say, I left quite quickly.

I had a chocolate chip cookie and coffee. That's four c's in a row. Chocolate Chip Cookie Coffee. Cookie...